Review by Adam Stephen Kelly
Stars Tiffany Dupont, Omar Sharif, John Rhys-Davies, Peter O'Toole, Tommy Lister | Written by Stephan Blinn
UK Certification 12 | UK RRP £12.99 | DVD Region 2 | Runtime 117 minutes | Directed by Michael O. Sajbel
Borrowing from the cheap, underhand tactics of the self-righteous “mockbuster” production company, The Asylum, Princess of Persia is a re-release taking on a new title to cash in on the Hollywood video game adaptation, Prince of Persia. Hoping to fool you into picking up the wrong film or believing that the two are somewhat related, Princess of Persia couldn't be more different. Originally One Night with the King, based on the novel of the same name, the film isn't a thrill-a-minute, high-gloss action adventure, but a slow, bland bible story that most likely will only see appreciation from the Christians who praise anything that's a bit heavy on the God side.
Yes, please do not be mistaken by the cover art into thinking that the film features a sword-swinging, wall-jumping heroine, as it doesn't, so said art is utterly irrelevant to the two hours of trudging cinema that I had to endure. If it is to be considered an epic at all, it is a low-rent epic, filled with grand architecture rendered horribly by seemingly archaic software, and gallantly galloping Persian soldiers strategically photographed from the air, only through a computer, in video game-like cinematics that would give even the hottest new release a run for its money graphically. Back in 2001. Perhaps Princess of Persia is only an epic fail.
Produced by a Christian movie company, Princess of Persia or One Night with the King, whatever you wish to call it, is the story of a young Jewish woman who pretends to be a Persian princess when the scent of war begins to fill the air. Soon enough she gets more than she bargained for when she's swept up in King Xerxes' search for a new queen. You know the rest, right? I thought so. It's completely predictable, so having to watch an overlong, dialogue-driven film is just not a pleasant experience when you can see what's around every corner. There are no twists, turns or anything out of the ordinary, it's just that—ordinary. I was alienated by the weakness of the script, the sheer lack of excitement from the story, and even the performances. The cast is full of reputable actors, but folks like ex-wrestler Tommy 'Tiny' Lister are just so out of place here, especially when he opens his mouth as rarely could I understand his lines. The film has a good dramatic score, though it's safe to say it doesn't fit with the visuals as there is no drama, but that's about it. I firmly suggest that you stay away unless you're devoutly riding the Jesus Express.
EXTRAS Absolutely nothing, but who really cares when a film is this uninteresting? Although the lack of any supplementary material reinforces the fact that this was a fast, cash-in re-release.