Dead Eyes Open review (DVD) ★

Review by Adam Stephen Kelly
Stars Birgit Dziobek, Rocco Finamore, Malte Gutkowski, Sonja Imping, Detlef Klewer,
Tanek Seranek, Tanja Waldmann, George A. Romero, Sidney Pauer, Roland Riemer | Written by Ralf Mollenhoff
Certification Unrated | US RRP $14.95 | DVD Region 0 | Runtime 85 minutes | Directed by Ralf Mollenhoff

Dead Eyes Open is a film made by a Romero baby. A film-maker who clearly owes his entire movie to the legendary innovator of zombies on the silver screen, though appears not to have picked up on the countless qualities of the Dead series that he so obviously enjoys, and has instead put together a thoroughly uninteresting, choppy and bland film about the flesh-eating living dead.

It's an inelegant, seen-it-all-before yarn of teenagers camping out in the woods, only to find themselves trapped within the trees by the evil that takes the form of zombies in this film, as well as the unsavory residents of the nearby village who will do whatever it takes to quell the undead outbreak. It's just completely unbecoming for a genre movie and insipidly drags along despite its rather slim running time. What's worse is that it is shot to look like a cheap, down and dirty film from the '70s, but in its absolute success in doing so, looks so worn, discoloured and out of focus that you can barely tell what's going on in the scenes. Couple this with reading subtitles as it's an independent German production and your eyes are not in for a treat. The director's sole intention for the stylisation of the film is its very detrement.

In what seems almost like a miscarriage of justice, George A. Romero himself actually makes a cameo appearance, dubbed in German of course, except it's probably the worst cameo I've ever seen thanks to it appearing like it was actually footage from a Q&A at a convention or, since this film is from 2008, I'd say, at a guess, the Diary of the Dead international press tour. However, as horrible as the cameo is, it does little to detract from the overall experience of the Troma-distributed Dead Eyes Open for the simple fact that it's so abominable.

EXTRAS ?? A 20-minute behind the scenes feature; the trailer; and a slideshow; as well as “Tromatic Extras” which include Troma T&A: Tromette of the Week Hypodermia stumbling through a skit about Geoffrey Chaucer intercut with the flashing of her breasts every time she goofs up; Radiation March: Troma's anti-pollution message from God knows how long ago; PSA: Motorhead's Lemmy discusses hermaphrodites, featuring South Park's Matt Stone and Trey Parker; Vintage Troma: a rather random 15-minute clip of Troma President Lloyd Kaufman going over a part of the All the Love You Cannes documentary; 15 trailers for other Troma releases new and old; and DVD credits.