Reviewed by Craig McPherson
Stars Steven Pasquale, Reiko Aylesworth, John Ortiz, Johnny Lewis,
Ariel Gade, Kristen Hager, Ian Whyte, Tom Woodruff Jr,
Sam Trammell, Robert Joy, David Paetkau, Matt Ward
Written by Shane Salerno
Certification UK 15 | US R
Runtime 86 minutes
Directed by Colin & Greg Strause
There’s a reason why B-grade horror movies such as 1964’s Two Thousand Maniacs have garnered a cult following today in spite of their numerous obvious flaws — they’re fun in a campy, you can see the kills coming from a mile away, manner. It’s this factor that single handedly redeems Alien vs Predator: Requiem (AvPR) from the cinematic trash heap. In spite of all its problems (and there are many), it delivers spectacularly in full chest-bursting glory.
Picking up where the original AvP left off, a Yautja (Predator), impregnated by a Xenomorph (Alien), yields it’s DNA cloning parasite while en-route to the Yautja home world from Earth. The result is the advent of a Xenomorph queen with the added strength, dexterity and select physical attributes of its Yautja host. Things quickly turn bloody aboard the ship, which subsequently crashes in the wilderness surrounding a remote Colorado town, setting free the queen, along with countless Xenomorph “face huggers”. From this point on everything’s a mere countdown to all hell breaking loose as the unleashed critters set about propagating themselves at a blistering rate.
For reasons unexplained, a single badass Yautja is dispatched across the interstellar void to clean up the mess, leaving me to conclude that these guys are either (a) unparalleled killing machines, (b) incredibly stupid, or (c) that the producers had only enough money for one suit of each alien species. Populated with cookie cutter human characters and ham handed, blatantly telegraphed script gimmicks that appear to have been penned by Mongo from Blazing Saddles (witness the scene when Marine mother returning from service in Iraq brings her daughter not an Elmo or Barbie, but a set of night vision goggles — I kid you not — and you just know those goggles are going to come into play later in the story) AvPR practically begs to be laughed at. And yet, in spite of all its flaws, I couldn’t help but come away having spent a fun filled 90 minutes of extra-terrestrial kick arse action because when hiss comes to shove, AVPR knows what the audience wants to see, and delivers.
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SECOND OPINION | Neil Davey ** First disappointment: despite the name, Aliens vs Predator: Requiem isn't a musical. A shame really, because this is a film that desperately needs some sort of novelty factor to detract from its predictable structure, confused action sequences and wooden cast of pretty unknowns. At a certain level, AvPR — to give the film its poster-friendly abbreviation — is an effective mainstream thriller. It presses the right buttons, shows a healthy disregard for small children and cuts right to the chase, eschewing the credits sequence in favour of a drop-kick straight into the action.
Of course, you won't have heard of any of the cast, so a credit sequence would be pretty bloody pointless anyway, but it's still a crowd-pleasing gesture. Unfortunately, after a reasonable set-up and a couple of decent set pieces, the Brothers Strause throw their cameras around with abandon, to the extent that every big Alien v Predator fight is impossible to follow. It may be billed as the universe's ultimate killers facing off but every fight scene is just a mess of flashing teeth, drool and wobbly tentacles and you'll only find out who's won at the end. As for the Alien / Predator hybrid... Well, unless you know what you're looking for — in which case you'll probably get the in-joke in the final scene as well — it's as confusing as Father's Day at Ulrika Jonsson 's house.
The only real positive that might come out of this film is a precedent for pairing previous hits for a violent sequel. Bring on The 40-Year Old Virgin V American Pie then or, even better, Love, Actually V Bridget Jones, in which Colin Firth is thrown into a pit with Colin Firth and can only be freed when he's killed himself. Hey, I'd pay to see it...
• Official Site
• Aliens vs Predator: Requiem at IMDb